


III. Forgiveness

by causeimdifferent



Series: Wanted [3]
Category: Downton Abbey
Genre: M/M, Romance
Language: English
Status: Completed
Published: 2014-06-29
Updated: 2014-06-29
Packaged: 2018-02-06 17:57:40
Rating: Not Rated
Warnings: Creator Chose Not To Use Archive Warnings
Chapters: 1
Words: 705
Publisher: archiveofourown.org
Story URL: https://archiveofourown.org/works/1867140
Author URL: https://archiveofourown.org/users/causeimdifferent/pseuds/causeimdifferent
Summary: <blockquote class="userstuff">
              <p>Thomas meets up with Philip in Hyde Park. A very good idea, indeed.</p>
            </blockquote>





	III. Forgiveness

„So are you seeing someone?“

„Why would you care?“

Philip's face crumbles: „Of course I would.“

 

They've met in Hyde Park, close to the zoo.

Under an old oak. It is midday and hot.

Philip did write a letter. _Please come and see me_ , was what it said in essence.

 

Philip won't have to work for another hour and Thomas is running errands, officially.

They sit on the lawn, Thomas leaning against the tree trunk.

„Thank you for coming. I know, it's a risk.“ Philip's legs are crossed, he keeps plucking at the grass.

_When did you start being fidgety?_

 

Jimmy has said the same, when Thomas told him what he was up to, just a little less friendly:

_Associating with a convicted pervert is a hazard._

_He's not a pervert, unless you think me one, too_ , Thomas replied.

Making Jimmy turn crimson, which looked very fetching.

_Who would have thought I'd ever come to your defense?_

 

„This summer reminds me of Our Summer“, Philip says.

_Since when are you sentimental?_

„Yes.“ Thomas rolls up his shirtsleeves.

The air is humid. And sultry.

There might be a thunderstorm soon.

 

„I would not mind another such summer with you.“ Philip stops tormenting the grass and looks straight at Thomas.

With those shiny hazel eyes, so warm and endearing. Eyes to get lost in.

 

 „I mean it“, Philip says and Thomas needs to look away not to drown in those eyes.

„And many more wonderful summers to come.“

_What?! Must be the heat playing tricks on my head._

Thomas's heart starts thumping wildly, his brain barely knows what to think.

„Stop playing those games, Philip, I'm tired“, is all it comes up with.

 

Philip leans forward, his top buttons are open and Thomas is reminded of the feel of his chest. Against his own.

And he longs for Philip's body touching his own as fiercely as if they've never parted, as if they've never struggled, as if they've never hated.

Perhaps because they never have.

 

Thomas closes his eyes, but he knows Philip has seen it. He still got it: He can still read Thomas like an open book.

There will be a smirk, a smug, self-satisfied remark: „You still want me, don't even try to deny it.“

 

„Thomas“, Philip says instead, „please – you don't know me at all, I never gave you a chance.“

„Why would you now?“

„I've changed.“

Thomas looks up again, and Philip's eyes are pleading.

„I've not allowed myself to love you. But now I do.“

 

Thomas blood feels like boiling. _It_ is _the heat, I'm hallucinating._

„Stop playing me“, he says, trying to make his voice sound firm, but his throat is dry as sandpaper.

„I'm not even trying“, Philip replies.

 

„It's over, too late“, Thomas says but he thinks about Philip's hands on his skin and his lips on his cock.

 

There is silence. Philip looks away, gnawing on his lips.

 

_I know, you're used to getting, what you want._

_But not now. Not anymore. Let me teach you a lesson._

 

„And yes, there is someone, by the way“, Thomas says.

Philip rubs his face with his palms and then he buries it in them.

 _You would not have come here, if there was,_ Thomas expects him to sneer.

 

„Is it serious?“ Philip looks up at him and Thomas just cannot lie to those eyes.

„Somewhat“, he replies not wanting to admit that he thinks it's pretty much hopeless.

 

„You love him?“

„I do.“

Philip nods.

 

„I have changed in some ways“, he says, „otherwise I've remained the same.“

_Broken. But still a fighter._

_No need to explain. I know. We are so alike - in some ways._   
_  
Perhaps now even more so, than ever before._

 

„May I send you another letter?“

„If you keep in mind that I will share it with Jimmy.“

„I won't write anything that will get you in trouble.“

„Nor yourself, right? Mother told you never to put anything in writing, remember?

 

They both chuckle. At first Thomas tries to fight it, as if doing something forbidden, as if giving himself away.

But suddenly something heavy is shifting, lifting. Leaving.

 

As Thomas walks home, he is whistling and people in the streets do smile at him.


End file.
